The Man

A simple flowchart for troubleshooting a broke...

A simple flowchart for troubleshooting a broken lamp. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

I stink.

No really, I do.

I haven’t showered in 48 hours due to the fact that my boiler broke down on Sunday, and despite earnest button-pushing and knob-twirling and attempting to decipher flow-charts in the manual, I have had to call in The Man.

Prior to calling in The Man, two other Mans came to look at it – partners of women-friends, each with varying degrees of competence in boiler button-pushing. One of them even had the front of it off and was poking around with the PCB. (The something-or-other Circuit Board, apparently. He did explain but I dozed off. Standing up, with my eyes open.)

Once he conceded he couldn’t fix it, the second Man agreed to call in the current Man on my behalf – mainly because I hate dealing with this shit, I don’t want to try and understand it, and ordinarily I would have left it to my husband to sort out.

As if this weren’t enough, I have faced the triple whammy of car tax, insurance and licence renewal this week. Where Mark enjoyed the challenge of finding the cheapest quote and the timely submission of inane DVLA bureaucracy, the whole process fills me with dread.

This year, I decided to take it in stages. First, I diligently wrote on my chalk board the words: Tax. Insurance. Licence. They taunted me for a week, before I decided to ask other people what I needed to do.

Anyway, they’re done now. I’m taxed, insured and licenced to within an inch of my life. My boiler is being fixed as we speak.

I am, for all intents and purposes, (and with the assistance of loving friends and family) coping with this hand I’ve been dealt, one task at a time.

But in some areas – the everyday tasks of real life – I really wish I were being cared for by my own Man instead of someone else’s.

13 thoughts on “The Man

  1. But the upside is…you’re getting it taken care of …because people just love you for who they understand you to be…true friends in a time of need. You lend your hand when you need to…now take theirs and be blessed that you have them. Besides, One of those Men has a woman at home who was likely secretly happy to be able to see him go out and be of good use to someone for a moment and out of her hair, to boot. 😉
    Now, quick, go grab a shower, before the winds change direction!
    Loving hugs, XX cj xx

  2. Come across a Man with a plane? No, not the airborne variety,- I know you hate those, -just a bloke who could shave a couple of centimetres off the bottom of my bedroom door? The new carpet is sticking and it’s driving me crackers. Love ya,babe! x

  3. It’s not the same I know, but it’s nice that you have ‘Mans’ who are happy to come and help. I think sometimes people want to be able to ‘do’ something practical to help and we have to just let them. Hugs xx

  4. Omg I can’t believe our similar circumstances. My boiler has had an intermittent fault since Ian died and I had to keep gettin someone out and I hate havin the responsibility of callin workmen in. I’ve actually waited months just boilin a kettle to wash pots because I didn’t want to call anyone out. Ps my shower was workin fine. Anyway on Monday I bit the bullet as my heatin wouldn’t kick in either. Also I’ve had to sort out car insurance and home and contents. All of which I didn’t have a clue. I’m not even sure I’ve done it right but I have paperwork which says I’m covered so who cares. My car insurance says I only do 500 miles a year. I think this is an oversight. Maybe I should drive in reverse. Xx

  5. I’ve been reading your blog for a while but this is my first comment – it’s not that I didn’t want to comment before because I love the blog, but I always thought that, as none of this nightmare stuff has happened to me, I sort of needed to be a proper ‘club member’ before I could – anyway – you write with such fantastic, smile making, humour in the middle of such an awful, tear making, nightmare. That takes something special and I just thought I would tell you that – well done on the award by the way…!!!!

  6. so many “firsts” to go through with things breaking down, finances, car shit, and having all the responsibility for it all – on top of the terrible grief that those situations visit upon us. when notices come about important issues I know I need to attend to, and all I pick up as I read through it all is
    “WAH, WAH, WAH” – it makes me crazy. most of us had to learn FAST about so many things that we hadn’t a clue about, but it seems to never let up, does it. it’s a great feeling when something gets tackled and resolved, making one feel proud and capable, and then, ka boom, there’s another pop-up I wish I could smack with a mallet, and make it disappear! or, better yet, just let hugh come back – PLEASE???- so I can feel as safe and secure again. my toilet seat has come unhinged – again – GRRR – I am searching the web to see if I can fix it with DUCT TAPE. I am beyond the decorator niceities, and will be satisfied with a modicum a stability – until I am forced to call The Man. fuck.

    love and light, XOXO


    • And Karen, remember having to go through all the bureaucratic shit when our hubbies first died?? How did we ever get through that? I look back now and wonder how I ever did it. Catatonia is the only answer I can come up with.
      Incidentally, my toilet seat has become unhinged. Again. Do let me know if the duct tape works! XX

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